Okay Cosmic Forces. I'm listening.

I want to have my house completely de-cluttered. I can't handle all the extra junk we have around. My husband sees everything as treasures. As you can imagine this means we are often at a standstill. I seem to go through spurts where I am really gungho and can get through lots of junk and can keep on top of the regular day to day tidying and cleaning. Then I go into a slump of frustration and tiredness and not caring and then go back to my energetic "let's get rid of this junk" period. Do you go through those cycles too?

Well, I was beginning to get into my energetic period. I had lot of plans for last weekend and this week. I was going to get so many projects done. I was even exercising everyday and feeling great about attaining my personal goals and my household goals. Then it happened. I was trying to get around my 19 month old who was in the middle of the doorway and whack. I totally slammed my foot against the door frame. Now this wasn't just your average hitting of foot against something. My foot was going on full speed velocity, for I was sure I had enough clearance. Man did it hurt. I managed to hobble my kids to school in the morning. When I got back and looked at my toe it was swollen and started to bruise. It looked like the toes of the people in the movie WALL-E. Basically a chubby circle. Usually my toes are very slender. (The only part of me that is.) I was 80% sure it wasn't broken, and anything I read about toe injuries said that you needed to rest it and keep it elevated. So that's what I did.

Well, a week later, a trip to my amazing and talented chiropractor (Dr. Moeller of Vital-Links, as I said during the appointment, you are magic) and no longer having my husband refer to my as hobbilty hobbit (he really loves me, for serious), I have had time to reflect on my injury, my recovery, and what this might mean in the grand cosmic scheme of things.

I need to slow down and let things take its course. That is a very difficult thing to do. When I get in my "at the end of the rope things need to change now" mentality I want to just go, go, go and get everything possible done. I think I need to relax. Take things slow. Break things down into manageable chunks so I don't get burnt out and get into my slumps. I need to not overburden myself so I become resentful when I am not getting the support or glowing praise I think I should receive. I also have to prioritize what is important and not try to constantly please everyone, because when I do that I really don't please anyone.

I also discovered that I need to do a better job of teaching my children and husband that they are working parts of the household. While I may be the domestic COO they play an important role in the success of our family and household. Just because I am out of commission for a few days does not mean that things should get out of control and that I need to do with everything. We definitely need to have some give and take with each other and our roles. And take to heart the saying "first observe then serve". We need to always look out for each other and always think of ways we can help one another to make our burdens light.

Now, it is one thing to come to these conclusions and want to do better and have things change. It is quite another to actual implement the necessary changes. We are creatures of habit. We do not like to have to change our routines or ways. We may know we have to but the hard work involved sometimes makes feel overwhelmed.

So, how do we get over these feelings of overwhelmedness? I'm not sure. If I knew the answer for sure I think my life and relationships would be vastly different and at times less frustrating. But, I should come up with something to help with starting the discussion. So, let's see. Think, think, think.

1. Be completely open and honest about your hopes, dreams and changes that should be made. Unless you can clearly articulate and take the brave step of letting others know, changes and the help necessary to makes these changes happen won't be able to happen.
2. Get everyone on board. If you are trying to make changes that will affect your spouse, kids, or household in general, you need to get everyone on board or at least get their support. This might mean changing or modifying the end result that you have in your mind. This can be a good thing and you might end up with an even better result. It is much better when you can work as a team. Hopefully your family will be more willing to help out when they feel they are participating members in the process instead of being dictated to.
3. If you mess up don't beat yourself up. Just pick yourself up and keep on trucking. One misstep shouldn't derail the entire enterprise.
4. Accept your limits and then work within them. Instead of wishing things were different or wanting things that are just not feasible at this time, (like a new house or renovated kitchen) look at the parameters you have to work with and work within them. You will be amazed what you can accomplish without a lot.
5. Don't wait for others to take the lead. Once your family has come to a consensus don't want for one of them to take the lead. Do what you agreed to do. Even if they haven't done their stuff yet. Hopefully this example will help motivate them and they will do their commitments.

I am sure that there are other steps or better steps, but that is what I came up with. These are probably things I need to do for myself as these seem to be a lot of my foibles.

While having a very major bruised foot was not really my plan, I am thankful that I was able to slow down. That things that were annoying me were able to be discovered and I could figure out what was needed so that my family and I could become better. So while I am grateful, hopefully the next time the cosmos want to teach me something they do so in a less painful way.

Have a happy weekend!